Sometimes the words we have to say on the newsgroup aren't really the final words at all. Whether they have anything to do at all with what we're posting, or if they have a mind of their own, they often leave us with a smile, or even an occasional spit-take.
|Too Much Buffy?
To Laze Or Not To Laze
Neil & the Velvets
Distinguishing Right From Left
|What to say to someone
A new name for Larry
Part of the Cthulu .sig-fest
This little piggy
Descartes vs. Neil
I Prefer My Geography Black
|On Slippers Monstrous
On Characters Thingies Resemble
Thingie Harem Mistress
South Park .sig Invasion
"I Love You" in Cat Language
On Gestures Batty
Coincidence? I Think Not!
Bill Squared, As .sig
NightWalker's Not So Tough
The Officially Licensed...
Lamenting Lack Of Summer Sunshine
Attack Of The Vegetarians
Thingie Writes Slash Fiction
Star Wars .sig
Tree For World Dictator
Too Much Buffy? - Lady Miss Tree
Who is glad that Mute is no one's spider-eating man-bitch.
To Laze Or Not To Laze - Loz
I'd suggest a slacking competition but I can't be arsed...
Manly .sig - Ghost
Who is manly damn it, his mommy tells him so.
Thingie Service - Lady Miss Tree
Who doesn't mind servicing the clients, just not *servicing* the clients.
Shoe .sig - Lady Miss Tree
Who hates shoes with a passion that burns deep within her sole.
Scully .sig - Lady Miss Tree (of course)
"Hello. My name is Agent Scully. You killed my father, my sister, my daughter and my dog, gave me cancer, abducted me, performed bizarre experiments on me and made me chase suspects in heels. Prepare to die."
Neil & the Velvets .sig - Harvey Lee
People keep posting about me, baby
They say my flirting is wrong
Well don't you worry, don't worry, no don't worry Luna
Cause I'm right here at home
-The Groper, by Neil & The Velvets
FOG People - MarkWCats
"There are your FOG people and your sun people, he said. I said I wasn't sure which kind I was, or where I was, or what I was doing, or what time it was, or of anything really. He nodded. FOGs'll do that to you, he said. "
Poetic .sig - Blacktech
I'm craving a bowl of God and a fingernail full of synchronicity. Where are all the dirty moments of knowing real divinity? God wrapped in foil and ribbon, handed off like a firecracker? I need a fix of the impossible, a drag off sheer nirvana.
Distinguishing Right from Left .sig - Lady Miss Tree
Who once drove with a friend who couldn't tell her left from right so we made Tanya-hand turns and Tree-hand turns...
What to say to someone famous - Sebastien Melmoth
~Sebastien, who's favourite moment at Popscene was meeting Damon Albarn of Blur and asking him "aren't you that guy in that band?"
Who's Neil .sig - Scientist Chris, as quoted by Jen B.
"Hello, I'd like to buy everything even vaguely related to Neil Gaiman"
"*Must* I whack you?"
New Name for Larry - Larry
Larry, who wants to now to be referred to as &, the Poster Formerly Known as Larry.
Part of the Cthulu .sig-fest - NightWalker
'Oh bother' said Pooh, as he looked upon the unspeakable visage of Cthulhu.
Nerd .sig - NightWalker
BorgDOS 5.0: Assimilate another (Y/N)?
Que Sera .sig - Harvey Lee
When I was just a little Thingie
I asked my Scary God Mother, what will I be?
Will I be Luna?
Will I be Jinx?
Will I be Ivory?
Que Sera Sera
What ever will be, will be
No matter what Destiny reads
I'll have sharp-pointies.
This Little Piggy .sig file - Harvey Lee
This little piggy went to Hades
This little piggy stayed home
This little piggy ate raw and steaming human flesh
This little piggy violated virgins
And this little piggy clambered over a heap of dead bodies to get to the top.
-Nanny Ashtoreth, Good Omens
Hamlet .sig - Sorcha
'Hamlet' By William Shakespeare
Ultra-Condensed by Adrien Arnold
Hamlet: Whine whine whine... To be or not to be... I'm dead.
Descartes vs. Neil - NightWalker
Descartes and Mark and Moses
I lined 'em up and smote 'em!
And comic books are infantile
unless Neil Gaiman wrote 'em!
I Prefer My Geography Black - Lady Miss Tree and Doc Vacation
LMT: Melbourne, where the only thing blacker than our wardrobes is our coffee. ;>
DV: London where the coffee is crap, but we have black clothing.
On Slippers Monsterous - Lady Miss Tree
Who frightened nurses last time she was in hospital by shuffling around in her slippers leaning on her IV pole and claiming the moon had been full the previous night and she hadn't quite recovered.
On Characters Thingies Resemble - Reg
who can probably also provide the lungs for John Constantine too
Thingie Harem Mistress - Lady Miss Tree
The Energiser Bunny of harem mistresses.
South Park .sig Invasion - Reg
Oh my Kenny! They killed God!
"I Love You" in cat language - Terje Bless
As a cat owner, I know this for a fact...
Nothing says "I love you" like a decapitated gopher on your front porch.
On Gestures Batty - Lady Miss Tree
You shall know me by the cut of my clothes, the smell of my cologne and my bat gesture.
Coincidence? I think not! - Terje Bless
Only two things came out of Berkley in the seventies; BSD and LSD.
Mac OS X is based on BSD and... There __are_no__ coincidences! :-)
Topic Shock - Lady Miss Tree
Dear god, did I just post something on topic? [faints from the shock of it all]
Zim Goodness - Eden
"Jhonen Vasquez wrote a comic book called Johnny the Homicidal Maniac. Let's give him a children's show!"
"Sounds good to me!"
Bill Squared, as .sig - Cassie
"Imagine Ayn Rand as a lava lamp."
Vinegar Tits - Lady Miss Tree
Who has never uttered the phrase "Vinegar Tits" in her life.
NightWalker's Not So Tough - Maggie
giggling at the thought of 'Walker being beaten up by a couple mice.
The Officially Licensced... - Lady Miss Tree
Official Neil Prop of the 2001 American Gods Tour.
Lamenting Lack Of Summer Sunshine - Lady Miss Tree
How am I supposed to get skin cancer if the goddamned sun won't come out?
Attack Of The Vegetarians - Sally
who is now imagining a horde of rampaging vegetarians. And who has the feeling she's typing too many syllables into her words. And had to go look up how to spell syllable. Bed time, perhaps? Who wants to join me?
Hooters - Lady Miss Tree
Actual conversation while driving through downtown Dallas:
"Y'all got Hooters down in Melbourne?"
"Actually, I have hooters all the time. See?"
Thingie Writes Slash Fiction! - Reg
(who is slightly troubled by the thought that he has just written Star Wars slash fiction and before it is even posted someone has gone 'Ew!')
Star Wars .sig - Scott
(Yoda's bored...can't the Dagobah any faster?)
Crow-Shaped Bananas - bafog1
who wonders how you would go about counting crows with a banana if there was only one banana?
Check - Lady Miss Tree
Glasses? Check. Red hair? Check. Breasts? Check!
Thingie Voyeurism - Jenny Jo
(getting acquainted with the contents of another person's hard-drive has a strange, voyeuristic attraction...)
Plastic Surgery - Lady Miss Tree
Who just wants an Amidala action figure so she can take it to a plastic surgeon and say, "I want a pair just like those!"
Not-So-Sacred .sig - Cassie
solitary eclectic esotericist pagan, religion major, amateur blasphemer
Thingie First - Jenny Jo
Jenny Jo (Hi Tyg! Tyg was my first Thingie!)
Tree For World Dictator - Bill ^2
--Bill^2, Official Bodyguard for the Tree for World Dictator 2004 campaign
Vocal Vacation - Lady Miss Tree
Who lost her voice entirely last night, much to Ghost's obvious delight.
Embalmed - Lady Miss Tree
Who would like to reassure Margret that the Embalming Fluid did not contaminate the popcorn-y goodness.