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RE: Outcome: Anatomy of a friendship: Let's be careful out there



My heartfelt condolences go out to you and the rest of Allan's family.
Thank you for sharing this with us.

Allison (Roadstermom)

> -----Original Message-----
> From: owner-oilheads@xxxxxxxxx [mailto:owner-oilheads@xxxxxxxxx]On
> Behalf Of Bruno Valeri
> Sent: Thursday, October 28, 2004 3:52 PM
> To: oilheads@xxxxxxxxx
> Subject: Outcome: Anatomy of a friendship: Let's be careful out there
>
>
> It's with sadness that I report the passing of my brother in
> law this morning. Allan went peacefully at 11:42am est.
>
> Allan sustained major head trauma while riding his
> motorcycle on Fri Oct the 8th and never regained
> consciousness. Though he might have survived the initial
> injuries, the secondary injuries were too severe.
>
> A heartfelt thank-you from the family and I for all the
> expressions of support, prayer, and compassion that we
> received. They meant a lot.
>
> I'm at peace with this. I'll miss him.
>
> Bruno
> Montreal, Canada
> CBI 929
> http://pages.videotron.com/mcrides
>
> ===================================
>
> Warning: long.
> It's with some ambivalence that I'm writing this.
>
> Sat Oct 9th
>
> I'm sitting here at the keyboard with a gamut of emotions
> running through me. Interspersed with searing clarity and
> painful haze. Flashes of memories, of life-intense moments
> streaming by.
>
> I'm typing this, driven by some need to maybe find some
> healing and resolution.
>
> On the surface, you could not find 2 more different
> individuals.
>
> I was related to Allan. He was my brother in law. But
> neither of us initially felt much affinity for the other.
> Different worlds, different apparent values, different
> perspectives.
>
> Maybe part of that had to do with some Alpha male thing
> coming into clash. Probably.
>
> This went on for a time.
>
> And then Allan bought a motorcycle. He was getting back into
> riding after a long hiatus. Soon, he began riding it on some
> solo week-end tours where he'd go off camping.
>
> Over time, the motorcycle element gradually brought us
> closer in conversation. One day, on pure impulse, we set up
> a ride. It was late in the afternoon, but no matter. The
> weather was great and I needed to get some air. We ended up
> riding well into the night.
>
> Good ride. Felt good. There was some apparent affinity in
> riding styles and personality. This led to more and longer
> rides. Again the pacing was comfortable in a manner that you
> don't notice it.
>
> He was a solid, reliable rider. Learned quickly and had an
> affinity for riding a motorcycle.
>
> Allan showed an appetite for life, exhibited a life energy
> that had me stand back and notice. In comparison, my
> approach was more reasoned.
>
> I smiled inwardly as I noticed how people reacted to him
> whenever we stopped. If you've read Zorba the Greek, you'll
> understand.
>
> More recently he had read an article in a local riding
> magazine about riding 1000 miles in a 24 hr period and was
> intrigued by the idea.
>
> I told him that we could do better than that. We could set
> up a ride that would allow us to do slightly better than
> that on the way down to a rally, ride some great roads in
> the area for 2 days, and then repeat on the return ride
> home.
>
> There were a couple of rallies happening in Missouri on the
> same week-end, about 25 miles apart. We could ride down to
> Arkansas, enjoy some great roads, work our way up to
> Missouri for the rallies, and then head back home.
>
> I began researching good roads for our destination. The trip
> itinerary that was shaping up was going to make this one
> very memorable ride. Too many good roads. Too little time.
>
> This would be a great trip.
>
> But first we needed to set up a training session that would
> serve to develop some endurance and also be a good shake-out
> for gear selection. A reasonably long ride that would enable
> him to go through the different parts of the riding day and
> weather patterns. This would allow him to sort out his
> equipment. Find out what worked and what didn't. It would
> also give me a sense of how much endurance he was capable
> of.
>
> On Sat Oct 2nd, we pushed off at 6am for a stroll down
> rte. 100 in Vermont. Great day for equipment shake-out. We
> had an early morning gamut of cool weather, fine drizzle,
> and fog.
>
> From the bottom of rte.100, we made decent time as we headed
> towards Vanson Leathers in Fall River MA. This was to be our
> turn back point.
>
> We enjoyed the short visit there as we took time to munch,
> browse the Vanson store, and finally plan possible return
> routes home.
>
> The ride back was an interstate blitz. The weather
> co-operated by throwing some stiff winds and rains across
> our path as we crossed New Hampshire towards 81. Perfect for
> sorting equipment.
>
> We made it back at around 11pm. A great, 800 mile day. Both
> of us were fresh and alert. Both of us were easily ready to
> ride another 200miles.
>
> We stood there at our split off point and briefly talked
> about the day. We both felt alive and vibrant with that life
> energy that I often quest for.
>
> Standing there I realized that I felt a definite
> brotherhood.
> During our rides together, I had discovered that there was
> so much more that we had in common than what we differed on.
> As I stood there, I realized that we had connected, a
> bonding of sorts.
>
> Bonding is a strange thing. You often don't notice while it
> is occurring. You become aware after the fact.
>
> As we clasped hands, I impulsively gave him a hug, the type
> of hug that I give my younger brother when we meet. This
> would have been unthinkable a short 2 months ago. But at
> that moment, it felt like the right thing to do. We then
> stood around talking for another 20 minutes or so.
>
> And then we went our separate ways. He going North, I riding
> East.
>
> The original plan had been to depart for our trip on Wed
> night and return late Sunday night.
>
> On Mon night I called him and informed him that I needed to
> cancel. Things were just too tight at work.
>
> On the other hand, there were still a couple more
> opportunities left to choose from in the upcoming weeks. We
> both could re-schedule. No problem.
>
> There was an interesting rally scheduled for Oct 14-17th in
> Copper Canyon, Mexico. Now THIS was going to be different.
> Different culture, different landscape, different language.
> A couple of more days required for the trip, but we both
> could accommodate this.
>
> On Friday night he called me and said he was going on a ride
> to check out some modifications that he had done on his
> bike, including a connection for his new electric vest. Was
> I interested in going along?
>
> Too tired. I was on the internet checking out the weather
> systems for our possible ride the next morning. I declined.
> I had some house chores that I wanted to do before our trip.
>
> I'd call him later that night, I'd told him. At 10:30pm, I
> left a message for him on his cell phone.
>
> At 7:30 on Sat morning the phone rang. It was his wife.
>
> She informed me that Allan had been involved in a motorcycle
> accident last night at 11:30pm.
>
> What?
>
> She said that it had occurred on their street.
>
> WHAT?
>
> She then said that he was at the hospital in the intensive
> care unit.
>
> W H A T ??!!
>
> The accident occurred less than 300 feet from his home.
>
> What happened is not clear. Though it seems that some
> element of exuberance might have initially been involved, it
> doesn't explain the outcome.
>
> I don't have many details yet, but it seems that the bike
> highsided. Allan received a strong blow to the head that
> left a visible indentation in his helmet liner. In the
> unfolding, the motorcycle tumbled and landed on him.
>
> Aside from severe head trauma, we know that he has suffered
> a fractured pelvis and punctured lung. They have yet to rule
> out spinal injury.
>
> As a result of extensive internal bleeding, keeping his
> blood pressure up at a safe minimum was a challenge for the
> first 8 hours in the emergency room.
>
> Thursday Oct 14th
>
> This event happened last Friday night.
> So far, Allan has been in an unresponsive coma. I've been at
> the ICU every night.
>
> He's now stable, brain pressure finally coming down.
>
> Prognosis is bleak.
>
> Life is fragile indeed.
>
> Let's be careful out there.
>
>
> Bruno
> Montreal, Canada
> CBR 929
> http://pages.videotron.com/mcrides

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